Home » Anthony Frosh, The Lighter Side

Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner!

August 20, 2009 – 10:16 pm13 Comments
Photo source: RealFooty.com.au, Credit: Craig Golding

Photo source: RealFooty.com.au, Credit: Craig Golding

By Anthony Frosh

When we created Galus Australis, we were determined not to become a trashy tabloid.  However, very occasionally we might suffer a lapse in our journalistic integrity.  This is one of those occasions.

As some of you may be aware, Australia’s most talked about celebrity (at least in the AFL states) is now living in the heart of Jewish Melbourne. (Apologies to our many readers outside of Melbourne.)  I speak of course of former West Coast Eagles legend, and now Richmond Tiger, Ben Cousins.

The number of “Cuz” sightings on Carlisle Street is growing weekly.  He’s been seen outside Gold’s bookstore, I myself have even bumped into him in Gan Eden florist, and it’s just matter of time before someone sees him in Haymishe bakery popping in for a delicious Mon Kichel (poppy seed cake).

I must say I feel guilty writing this.  Partly, because it is such a voyeuristic Woman’s Day kind of article.  But mostly, because I didn’t invite him home for shabbos that time I bumped into him.  After all, it’s the proper way to welcome a stranger into the neighbourhood.  I for one won’t make that mistake again, and I implore any of you who come across Ben looking for metziah in one of the never-ending closing down sales at Culture Shock (or is it called Jerusalem Gifts?) to invite the man home for shabbos.  You will be rewarded as he sings some his favourite zemirot to the tune of the West Coast Eagles club song.  Although even as an Eagles supporter, I must admit his rendition of Adon Olam to the tune of the Tigers’ club song sounds even better – love how he uses Azay Melech in place of the classic “Yellow & Black” bit.

The question remains: Why exactly is Ben Cousins living in Ripponlea rather than a more fashionable neighbourhood like Prahran or South Yarra?  Well, some viewers of Footy Classified may remember when the chief football writer at The Age, Caroline Wilson, accused Ben of “wearing an arrogant hat.”  Now, I know some other gentlemen in the neighbourhood who have been accused of the same thing.  While the offending hat, as worn by Cousins in the above photograph, is not quite as striking as a shtreimel, I’m sure Ben finds plenty of common ground with his more formally dressed neighbours.

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13 Comments »

  • Do you know how quick he is, running from house to house on a Friday night as the local Shabbos goy? Some of the locals even refer to him as der couzin!

    I reckon Ripponlea is becoming the cheaper alternative to living in mega-trendy Elwood (which now has Bondi-like property prices). It’s only 5 minutes away, and much cheaper. Not sure how easy it is to find a place with only one bedroom though …

    GO TIGERS!

  • eli says:

    Did you know that ben cousins vos jewish,
    whatya mean?
    vot other footballer do you know vould be shlepping in Carlisle st if he wasnt jewish,
    ahh well this reminds of a song

    Di Grine Kuzine

    Tsu mir iz gekumen a kuzine
    Sheyn vi gold iz zi geven, di grine
    Bekelakh vi royte pomerantsn
    Fiselakh vos betn zich tsum tantsn.

    Herelakh vi zaydn-veb gelokte
    Tseyndelekh vi perelakh getokte
    Eygelakh vi himl-bloy in friling
    Lipelekh vi karshelekh a tsviling.

    Nisht gegangen iz zi, nor geshprungen
    Nisht geret hot zi, nor gezungen
    Lebedik un freylekh yede mine –
    Ot aza geven iz mayn kuzine.

    Un azoy ariber tseyner yorn
    Fun mayn kuzine iz a tel gevorn
    “Peides” hot zi vokhenlang geklibn
    Biz fun ir iz gornisht nit geblibn.

    Haynt az ikh bagegen mayn kuzine
    Un ikh freg ir: S’makhtsu epes, Grine?
    Ziftst zi op, un kh’leyen in ir mine:
    Brenen zol Colombus’ es medine!

  • ariel says:

    Last night I attended the Central Synagogue concert in Sydney starring Chazan Yitzchak Meir Helfgot. Jimmy Barnes sang A Yiddishe Mamme with him in duet and then Am Yisrael Chai.

    Jimmy then revealed to the audience that he in fact is a yid! mamash!

    Stranger things have happened and maybe there’s something pulling Ben Cousins towards the schtetl

  • Zoe says:

    Nice Eli (at least I think so, as I don’t know what it says?) – but a translation for those of us who don’t speak, read or write Yiddish?

    As for Ben Cousins, bleh!

    Editor’s note: A translation can be found here:

  • Jason says:

    Jimmy & Helffy can be viewed at

    http://www.jwire.com.au/?p=3802

    It appears Jimmy said …I must be Jewish” rather than “I am Jewish”.

    Gulf of a difference from my perspective.

    Still, Jimmy’s a good ambassador for Jews, irrespective of him being an “is” or a “must”.

    Hot ehr zeiyer goot gemacht, goot gemacht…..GOOT Gemacht!

  • Jason says:

    Hmmm,

    More to this than I first thought.

    It appears Jimmy may be a “Yankele” after all.

    http://www.jwire.com.au/?p=3953

    “But before he performed he told the audience that he had telephoned his mother yesterday to ask her why she had given him a Star of David when he was about 18. He told the crowd that his mother had said: “My mother gave it to me and her mother had given to her so I thought I would give it to you.” He then said that he had asked his mother if her grandmother was Jewish and she replied that she was and that her name was Esther. Barnes continued: “If I get this right, my great grandmother was Jewish, my grandmother was Jewish, my mother is Jewish so I must be Jewish.” If he was expecting a welcome home, he got it is spades as the crowd applauded the story rapturously.”

  • Zoe says:

    Editor – thanks :)

  • Rochelle says:

    I thought you were going to say itsik was comming for dinner.

  • Eri says:

    Has anyone heard the famous yiddish tune called the “The schwarze und gelbe kuzine”?

  • frosh says:

    Hi Eri,

    I must say that I always preferred “Der bloy und gelbe kuzine”

  • Adassish says:

    In the tiny street that cousins live he has as neigbours 2 Adass dayanim, their school’s Jewish principal, former Adass yeshiva ‘s rosh yeshiva 2 adass melamdim plus. I think there are a total of 9-10 families – with 6 shtreimels

  • frosh says:

    Hi David,

    I read an interview with Ben Cousins in The Shabbat Record where he was asked what part of the Shabbat he looks forward to the most.

    He replied: the Seudah Shlishit.

    Why: By this time, the other shabbos goyim have been run off their feet and his superior fitness and conditioning thus allows him to come to the fore.

  • Of course we all know the Seuda Shlishit is the Premiership Seuda!

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